I was brought under conviction for sin during sickness. I got to studying about my poor soul, and was brought to feel that I was grievously sinning against God. I often took the Testament, and read till tears poured down my cheeks, and then put the book away, with a nameless and chilling dread, and went from my house to walk and talk away my impressions. I lived this way for some time, and told no one of my convictions--not even my husband--and tried to think myself as good as anybody.

      After a year my little daughter took sick, and God called her away. This brought me sorrow and renewed conviction. The night before my daughter's death, she said:

      These words of heavenly trust told me that I was not on my way to the home of which she spoke. I grieved the more about my condition. I saw plainly that I was on the road to destruction.

      At length I sought mercy in public at the mourner's bench. Elder A. X. Shoemaker pointed me to [84] the bleeding Lamb on Mount Calvary. I was near the cross, but doubted. For five nights I presented myself in prayer, but lingered through them and for a while afterwards in distress.

      Elder A. H. Long commenced a protracted meeting in Lafayetteville, Pennsylvania, at which I again sought for peace. I was unsuccessful at first, and thought I had become the despised of earth, when, at the last hour of hope, God sent me peace. I cannot express the joy I felt.

      The succeeding day I followed my Master in baptism, and became so happy as to praise Him, coming up out of the water. I and much encouraged to live a Christian life, and ask the prayers of the faithful that I may hold out.

[THW 84-85]